100 Funny teacher jokes that will make your students laugh

In this guide

• Making your students laugh
• School jokes
• Animal jokes
• Dinosaur jokes
• Sports jokes
• Technology jokes
• Holiday jokes
• Seasonal jokes
• History jokes
• Geography jokes
• Food jokes
• Science jokes
• Maths jokes
• Music jokes
• Gaming jokes
• Bonus jokes

Making your students laugh

Students of all ages can appreciate a funny joke. Laughter in the classroom can also be a great way to build relationships with your students and jokes are a quick and easy opportunity to introduce humour. 

Personally, I enjoy jokes that involve puns or a play on words so I am including a few of those. I have attempted to include a variety of jokes for students in various grade levels and themed for different topics and subject areas.

There are different ways to share jokes with students. Perhaps you could have a specific time during the day that would be a “joke of the day” moment? At my school, one of our secretaries sends out a joke each day with her daily email. You might decide to write a joke on the board each day, or put a daily joke on your presentation slides.

You could include a time for students to share jokes as well. Set appropriate parameters (joke must be school appropriate, you must know the whole joke, take turns sharing jokes, etc) and allow students to share jokes with partners or the whole class. 

In this blog I have attempted to share different types of school appropriate jokes that can be shared with students. They cover a range of topics so there is sure to be something to appeal to everyone.

I even tried some of them out on my own children, and they have been student approved! 

Have fun laughing and being silly with your students!

School jokes

1. What would happen if you threw all the books in the ocean?  

• It would cause a title wave. 

2. Why did the nose not want to go to school?

• Because he was tired of getting picked on. 

3. How do you get straight A’s?

• By using a ruler.

4. What object is king of the classroom?

• The ruler.

5. What did the pencil sharpener say to the pencil?

• Stop going in circles and get to the point. 

6. What do librarians take when they go fishing?

• Bookworms.

7. What is the world’s tallest building?

• The library, because it has the most stories. 

Animal jokes

8. Why do seagulls fly over the sea? 

• Because if they flew over the bay, they would be bagels! 

9. What do you call two monkeys who share an Amazon Prime account? 

• Prime-mates.

10. What do you call a penguin in the desert? 

• Lost.

11. What do you call a dinosaur fart? 

• A blast from the past. 

12. What do you call a group of musical whales? 

• An orca-stra! 

13. Is there anything worse than when it’s raining cats and dogs? 

• Yes, hailing taxis.

14. Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? 

• Because they are so good at it.

15. What did the snail say when it was riding on the turtle’s back?

• Wheeeeeee! 

16. Why did the fish blush?

• Because it saw the ocean’s bottom. 

17. Why did the fastest cat get kicked out of school?

• He was a cheetah. 

18. What do turtles, eggs, and beaches have in common?

• Shells.

19. What did the shark say when he ate a clownfish?

• This tastes a little funny.

20. What is black and white, black and white, black and white?

• A penguin rolling down a hill.

21. How do bees get to school?

• On the school buzz.

Dinosaur jokes

22. What do you call a dinosaur that crashes its car?  

• Tyrannosaurus Wrecks.

23. What kind of dinosaur can you ride in a rodeo?

• A bronco-saurus. 

24. How do you know if there is a stegosaurus in your refrigerator?

• The door won’t close. 

25. What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping?

• A dino-snore. 

26. Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

• Because chickens didn’t exist yet. 

Sports jokes

27. What does a sprinter eat before a race? 

• Nothing, they fast. 

28. What runs around a football field but never moves? 

• A fence.

29. What has four legs, is green, and can kill you if it falls from a tree?

• A pool table.

30. What is hardest to catch the faster you run?

• Your breath.

31. What is something you can serve but never eat?

• A volleyball.

32. What did the baseball glove say to the ball?

• Catch you later.

33. What do you call a pig that plays basketball?

• A ball hog.

34. What is the hardest part of skydiving?

• The ground. 

35. Why is tennis a loud sport?

• The players raise a racquet.

Technology jokes

36. Why did the mobile phone get glasses? 

• Because they lost all of their contacts.

37. What did the computer do at lunch time?

• It had a byte. 

38. What’s a computer’s favourite snack?

• Microchips. 

39. Why did the computer keep sneezing?

• It had a virus. 

40. Why was the computer cold?

• It left the Windows open. 

Holiday Jokes

41. Why did the turkey form a band?

• It had the drumsticks. 

42. What do gingerbread men have on their beds?

• Baking sheets.

43. What did Santa say on Christmas morning?

• That’s a wrap. 

44. Why couldn’t the teacher find anyone to help her wrap gifts?

• No one was present. 

45. Where do elves go to vote?

• bThe North Poll.

46. What do you call a reindeer on Halloween?

• A cari-boo.

Seasonal jokes

47. What do you call an old snowman? 

• Water. 

48. Why is it bad to iron a four-leaf clover? 

• Because you should never press your luck. 

49. What did the snowflake say to the road?

• Let’s stick together. 

50. What did one snowman say to another snowman?

• Does it smell like carrots?

51. What did the pig say on a hot summer day?

• I’m bacon. 

52. What do you call a snowman in Summer?

• A puddle. 

History jokes

53. Why did Julius Caesar never say thank you to anyone? 

• He didn’t speak English.

54. What do Alexander the Great and Kermit the Frog have in common? 

• The same middle name. 

55. Where did medieval knights park their camels?

• Camelot.

56. Why are there not any knock-knock jokes about America?

• Because freedom rings. 

57. What do history teachers talk about on dates?

• The good old days. 

58. Which explorer was the best at hide and seek?

• Marco Polo.

Geography jokes

59. What’s the best part about living in Switzerland?

• I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus. 

60. What did the ground say to the earthquake?

• You crack me up. 

61. How can you tell that the ocean is friendly?

• It waves. 

62. What travels all around the world but stays in one corner?

• A postage stamp. 

Food jokes

63. What does a clock do when it’s hungry?

• It goes back 4 seconds.

64. What do you call a sad strawberry? 

• Blueberry.

65. What is red and bad for your teeth? 

• A brick. 

66. Why did the coffee file a police report?

• It got mugged.

67. How do you make an egg roll? 

• You push it. 

68. What do you call a fake noodle?

• An im-pasta.

69. Why did the mushroom get invited to all of the parties?

• Because it was such a fungi. 

70. Have you heard about the giant pickle?

• It was a big dill. 

71. What did the cupcake say to its icing?

• I’d be muffin without you. 

72. What is corn’s favourite music?

• Pop.

73. Have you heard the rumor about butter?

• Nevermind, I shouldn’t be spreading it. 

74. Two muffins were in the oven. One said “boy, it is hot in here.”

• The other muffin said “Ahh…a talking muffin!”

Science jokes

75. You can’t trust atoms.

• They make up everything. 

76. What do you call a scientist’s self portrait?

• A cell-fie.

77. Why did the physicist break up with the biologist?

• They had no chemistry. 

78. Why are chemists good at solving problems?

• Because they have all the solutions. 

79. I lost an electron.

• Are you positive?

Math jokes

80. What country’s capital is growing the fastest? 

• Ireland. Every day it’s Dublin.

81. What did the triangle say to the circle?

• You’re pointless. 

82. Why do plants hate algebra?

• Because it gives them square roots. 

83. What is a maths teacher’s favourite dessert?

• Pi.

84. Why was the maths book sad?

• Because it had too many problems.

Music jokes

85. What did the drummer name his two daughters? 

• Anna one, Anna two.

86. Why did the singer climb the ladder?

• Because she wanted to read the high notes.

87. Why do fluorescent lights hum?

• Because they forgot the words. 

88. What type of music are balloons scared of?

• Pop music.

89. Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

• In the piano!

90. What do you call a cow that can play a musical instrument?

• A moo-sician

Gaming jokes

91. How do you get a Bulbasaur on a bus?

• You poke’ em on. 

92. Which room is Mario too tall to fit inside?

• A mushroom.

93. What kind of swimwear does Sonic the Hedgehog wear to the beach?

• A Speedo.

94. Why can’t you blindfold a Pokemon?

• It will Pikachu.

95. What do you call a fantastic Minecraft celebration?

• A Block party.

96. What is the national sport of Minecraft?

• Boxing.

Bonus jokes:

97. What do dentists call their X-rays? 

• Tooth pics! 

98. Where is the best place to sit when a submarine is diving?

• Inside.

99. What is a pirate’s favourite movie rated?

• R.

100. What dies but never lives?

• A battery.

Whatever way you choose to incorporate jokes into your classroom, I hope these help you start a little fun with your students and help develop your relationship with them.